justsookie | travelers traveling and on, like the wheel that will take you home

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mathias

travelers traveling and on, like the wheel that will take you home

[ continued from here ]

She remembers, again, the fact that children born on the island have come to expect the annual downfall of snow, of white blanketing their land momentarily in a way so pristine and pure. There's no need to worry about the snow lasting longer than kids might like, because there are only so many days, easily counted down even by the youngest of children. Smile broadening, Sookie tilts her head in Sam's direction, taking in the color of her eyes, brighter now for all her excitement. "Do you now? Guess that makes you a winter kind of girl," Sookie grins, leaning forward to rest her chin in her palm. "I'm more of a summer girl. I love the sun too much to give it up for anything."

Pressing her lips together at the thought of a certain vampire who would be all too invested in her turning back that admission, Sookie glances up in Mathias' direction again. "Should we set a time? Just so that I make sure I can beg out of a shift if I have to," she smiles, cheeks flushed at the thought. (She wonders, briefly, what Neil would even think, were he to know about any of this.)

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"That's good," Mathias says, thinking of his own parents briefly. It isn't that they were bad parents. He's always known he and Henrich were very loved by the both of them, but his mother in particular has always been very similar in nature to him. They're quiet people, very reserved and as such, affection, emotional proclamations, things like that were always extremely few and far between in their home.

"It's good for people to have that," he continues. "Kids especially, I think." It's why he tries, for Sam's sake. He isn't especially prone to talking a lot or being vocal with his affections, but he hopes he makes up for it in other ways. "My parents were both fairly... reserved. Especially my mother." It doesn't mean that they didn't love each other, he knows this. All his adult life, he's been very aware of how much in love they still were and he's always admired and respected that, but it's a very different demonstration of love than he's seen around him on the island.

Not better or worse, he tells himself, just different.

"Oh, definitely. Just having a kinda stable family life, that's not something that everyone gets to enjoy," Sookie nodded thoughtfully, before bringing her hand to her chin. "But to have, you know, parents who also just get involved in the lives of their kids, I think that's good too. Lots of different ways to do it, obviously, but sometimes I feel like there's nothing better than just being willing to get dirty with your kids and make mud pies, or— or here, I guess, going out to make sandcastles. Stuff like that."

Folding her arms on the table, she straightens, backtracking. "Er, not to say that being reserved is a bad thing. Although, come to think of it, I never really knew a lot of reserved parents in my area growing up, so maybe I just don't really have the experience there."

Mathias laughs and shakes his head, because he knows she doesn't mean it as any sort of insult. That having reserved parents around is likely as foreign to her as having outgoing parents would be to him. And sometimes he remembers wishing his parents would have been more outwardly affectionate, though now, so far removed from them, he's just glad to have had them at all.

"My parents certainly did all that, they were just... quiet about it," he says with a smile, shaking his head again. He can't quite explain it. "It isn't that I ever doubted that they loved me, but we... we were all very reserved. Except my brother. It always felt natural to us, but I know it seemed strange to other people." He's long since accepted that and it doesn't bother him. The way he interacts is sometimes looked upon as strange and he's come to accept that as well. It unsettles people, he thinks, that he likes to watch for longer before deciding to speak.

"Not strange, I'd say, so much as just... different," Sookie concludes with a firm nod. Although all of the families in the area had a tendency to be more loud and boisterous than the ones Sookie had met on the island, she wouldn't have said that all of the families in Bon Temps were similar, necessarily. Each one still had its idiosyncrasies. Each one had its weaknesses and flaws. And as far as she was concerned, something had clearly worked out in the right way for Mathias to be so kind, understanding, supportive in a way that Sookie didn't often see.

"But it's funny to hear that there was a black sheep, so to speak, in your family. I don't think we really had the same," laughs Sookie, starting to doodle in the margins of her page. "All of us Stackhouses were pretty clearly cut from the same cloth. Though I'd like to think I don't give into whims as often as my brother. And neither of us is as smart as our gran was."

Mathias thinks that's probably not true, that people don't often see their own strengths, but he only smiles, looking down at his own paper as well. "Henrich didn't mind so much, being the black sheep," he says. There had been things about his brother that had driven him crazy, things that he'd wished would change, but in the end, Henrich had been comfortable with who he was. And that, at least, was something they'd shared.

"No one really minded, I think," he continues thoughtfully. "It always pleased my mother a little bit, knowing he was so willing to... put himself out there, I think is the expression." He wonders if his mother thinks about that now, if she blames Henrich's impulsive nature for anything that happened. Mathias tries not to blame his brother, but sometimes, in moments of anger and regret, he can't help but wonder if everything would have been different if Henrich had just stayed at the hotel. If he hadn't demanded that he go spend time with a girl he barely knew at all.

But he never would have done such a thing. For Henrich, spending time with that girl was the single most important thing in his life at the time.

"I guess that's natural for parents. Wanting their kids to exceed them in some way, even if it's just... the ability to socialize," Sookie nods in understanding, wondering if she's ever managed to make her own parents proud in such a way. Something told her that she didn't. Not quite. The both of them probably spent more time worrying than anything else, and her smile grows momentarily tight at the thought. She remembers the way that they were with her as a child, but sometimes she wonders if they'd be proud of her decisions as an adult, or what they'd think about seeing the way their little girl turned out. Probably not the same way they imagined her in dreams.

She's only a waitress, after all.

"Sometimes I think I could stand to learn a bit from Jason there, too. Not that I have a really hard time meeting people, I guess, but it's a bit harder to get them to like me. This place has definitely not been the norm in that regard," she adds, even as she suspects that the reason for that has less to do with her personality and everything to do with what she used to be capable of.

"I have a hard time believing that," Mathias says before he can stop himself and it isn't that he doesn't mean it -- he absolutely does -- but that he usually doesn't say things like that. Especially not after knowing a person for such a short period of time. But he can't imagine anyone not liking Sookie. They haven't known each other long, but even now Mathias knows he likes her, he enjoys being around her and it isn't that he's particularly difficult to impress, but that he's not an exceptionally outgoing person.

It's easier, most of the time, to not spend time worrying about whether or not he's making friends. With Sookie, he feels close already, even if he can't say as much.

"I mean... I can't imagine anyone not liking you," he says honestly. At this point, he's already spoken his mind more often than he usually does and she has yet to run away. He can't see any good reason to stop now.

Wrinkling her nose, Sookie immediately waves her hand in dismissal of the assessment, shoulder hunching bashfully as she shakes her head and curls cascade about her shoulders. "You only say that because you haven't exactly seen the worst sides of me. Or what I look like when I'm totally overworked. Because... I mean, I still work as a waitress most days on the island, but it's totally different when you're trying to make ends meet and get stressed every day about looking kind enough to pull in the tips," Sookie points out, laughing under her breath. "So I'm... quite different here. Freer, you could say."

Crossing her arms over her chest, she stares over, eyes careful and assessing.

"Although maybe this means I should leave now while I'm ahead, keep your impression a good one while I try to figure out how I should prepare for our date," muses Sookie, brow arching in thought.

Mathias suspects most people feel freer on the island in the long run, away from the lives they had back home, away from stress and, too often, danger. And he doesn't want her to leave just yet, but he also knows he can't ask her to stay without sounding perhaps a little too pushy, a little too eager.

"You won't be the only one trying to figure out how to prepare," he answers, knowing he's going to spend the next several days wondering exactly how it's going to go or what he should do. It isn't that he's particularly nervous, but he wants the date to go well. He likes Sookie, which is a simple emotion, but one he hasn't experienced in some time. He likes her and he wants to impress her.

"Are you going now?" Sam asks, looking up at Sookie. "Will you come back to colour more?"

"You just have to be yourself," Sookie assures Mathias, reaching over to rest her hand on his briefly, just long enough that her heartrate seems to spike, pounding against her chest. She thinks that leaving for the moment is probably the best thing to do— if she stays much longer, surely she'll start tripping over her tongue, choking on her words. Better to leave the overanalyzing to herself, in the confinement of her hut. "Believe me, that'll be more than enough."

Turning to Sam is easier, Sookie's smile splitting wide as she pulls the girl close enough to press a kiss to the top of her head, ruffling her hair briefly before smoothing it out with gentle fingers. "I'm going now, yes," she confirms with a nod. "But I'll definitely be back to color, and I'll be back lots. Next time, I'll make sure to save more time on my schedule for you, okay Sam?"

"Okay," Sam says brightly, then returns to her colouring. The confirmation that Sookie will come back is enough for her and Mathias thinks it should be enough for him, too. It's so much easier for a child, though, and although he doesn't doubt Sookie, he doubts his ability to impress her at all or make her want to return.

"I can be myself," he says, instead of any of the thoughts running through his mind, any of the worries that he's suddenly imagining. There's no sense doing this, making himself so nervous that he begins to stumble over words or falls too quiet altogether. "I'll walk you to the door," he offers, pushing back from the colouring, not only to be polite but because he wants to see her for just a moment without Sam watching. He has nothing to hide from her, nothing he's ashamed of, but he isn't sure what she might think if he kisses Sookie, even if it's only on the cheek.

Smiling one more time at Sam, Sookie looks up just in time to see Mathias rise from the table and follows suit, giving Sam a last wave as the both of them head to the entrance of the hut. When Sookie thinks about it, this is the most she's felt like she's been a part of a home in ages. Months, at least. And no matter how pathetic that might sound to someone who doesn't know her, she's always had a yearning for this, for people who live in a home from day to day, who come to expect one another to be there, who won't turn one another out no matter what mistakes they may make over time. That's family, after all— unconditional.

She finds that her grin widens.

"It was really sweet of you to invite me in," Sookie murmurs, trying to keep her voice low enough to keep from disturbing Sam. "Even though I totally stopped by unannounced and all."

His smile grows as well and he shakes his head, dismissing that. "I invited you in with selfish motivations," he admits, though he's sure she's very aware of that by now, especially the way he pauses by the door and catches her hand. Although he hasn't dated all that much -- Henrich was always better at it, better at impressing girls, better at getting them to let down their walls -- he finds it funny that he should feel so hesitant now, after everything they've already done.

And still, he is hesitant. He has her hand now, remembers the touch of her fingertips on his skin and his neck heats at the memory, almost able to feel the sensation again.

"You can stop by whenever you would like," he tells her and even with her hand in his, he's still reluctant to press forward and kiss her, not because he doesn't want to. More than anything, he wants to kiss her goodbye, to know that he might be able to start their date with the same gesture. For just a moment, though, he wonders if she wants him to.

A girlish blush rises to her cheeks as their hands twine again, and Sookie finds herself distracted by the contact, her thumb brushing gently over the side of his palm. It's such a tiny thing compared to all that they've already done and seen of one another, but there's something about the sunlight that makes her shy, something about taking a few steps back that makes this more serious, and if nothing else, Sookie just doesn't want to mess this up. She's not naive enough to expect a sudden happily ever after for the two of them, but even the start and potential of something deep and lasting, friendship or more, has her heart fluttering against her chest.

"I'll keep that in mind," she tells him, not wanting to seem to eager, and perhaps more importantly, not sure how often she should come over at all. Self-restraint's never been her best skill, and with the three who live in the hut being so much of a family, she doesn't want to intrude too often. Not until she's naturally, perhaps, become part of that group.

Instead, she pushes up on her toes, pressing a brief kiss to the corner of Mathias' lips.

"Good," Mathias says and he smiles into the kiss, then turns his head slightly, catching her mouth in a longer kiss. There's something about the blush that he finds particularly sweet, and that she's leaned up to kiss him is enough to tell him that this is okay. This will be okay. They've planned a date and he hopes he won't do anything between now and then to give her reason to cancel.

"Then I will see you this weekend," he says against her mouth, then pulls back enough to see her, his fingers still twined with hers.

"See you this weekend!" Sam shouts from the other room and Mathias lets out a surprised laugh, glancing back toward her. She hasn't looked up from her colouring, but it's clear she can hear them and doesn't seem to have any interest in what they're doing beyond the knowledge that she'll get to see Sookie again.

Her breath catches when he turns enough to capture her lips in full, entire body tensing for a second before it melts away, her hand raising to brush at his cheek as she smiles against his lips. It's sweet, it's romantic, and it's just enough to keep from cloying as her hand brushes down the side of his neck, so glad for the contact, and even more glad for him.

"See you this weekend!" Sookie calls back to Sam, pulling away for that brief instant before her hand rests on Mathias' chest, feeling his head underneath. "And I'll see you as well." Slowly and reluctantly, she squeezes his hand before letting go of it as well, turning on the step and heading out into the sun, still feeling as though she might be on the cusp of bursting.

But she surely doesn't mind bursting like this.

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travelers traveling and on, like the wheel that will take you home

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