justsookie | build me a star in your forehead

The problem with keeping track of Jason Stackhouse was the fact that he wasn't an easy person to keep track of even during the best of times. Absentminded and prone to flights of fancy, it wasn't unusual for Jason to up and vanish for a number of hours, only to come back with a wide grin on his face and a lady on each arm for his efforts, or for him to return with Hoyt draped over a shoulder, having downed one too many beers for his sunny-minded disposition. Only in recent years did an extended absence tend to be indicative of trouble rather than adventure, and so when Sookie's third call landed in Jason's voice mail, she tried not to think too much of it.

Then again, in Darrow, it was hard for silence not to become suspicious after a time.

"You'd better be there, Jason Stackhouse," she muttered under her breath as she made her way over to his apartment. Only once she was halfway there did she realize that she probably could have afforded to call Fred first, who was unlikely to irresponsibly let a call go without a relatively prompt answer, but Sookie didn't want to interfere too much with what she knew to be an ongoing honeymoon period between the two of them.

She didn't want to be that kind of overbearing sister.

Instead, she cleared her throat once she made it to their front door, and ignoring the way that her heart pounded against her chest, she raised a hand and rapped sharply. One, two, three times in quick succession.

And then she could only wait.

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It's been a weird couple of days. When Fred woke up to find Jason gone, her first thought had been that maybe he'd been called into work and didn't wanna wake her up. But as that day went on, it became obvious what had happened. It's happened enough to her, between the island and Darrow, that she ought to know by now.

It's never gonna stop, these places sending people through dimensions against their will.

She's starting to feel like she did back in that room in the Hyperion. Back when she was writing on walls and trying to find the answer in an equation. The walls are clear now, but she's still been squirreled away, called in sick to work while she tries to figure out how the pieces all fit together.

And she doesn't realize that she hasn't called Sookie until there's a knock at the door, and Quark jumps from her lap to bark at it.

Fred opens it when she sees Sookie through the peep hole, not sure how she's gonna say what she needs to say, even if she's got a pretty good idea that maybe Sookie might pick up on it just from the look on her face.

The sound of Quark's barking doesn't give Sookie the immediate relief that it normally does. Usually, Quark's barking is enough to earn a chastising from Jason whenever he's around — nothing sharp, but instead a soft, sweet coaxing that he usually reserves for those in his care. There's nothing this time, not even when the lock of the door slides free.

And then the look of Fred's face tells Sookie everything.

Drawing in a deep breath, Sookie's hands immediately tighten into fists. Only a second later does she release them, knowing that it won't do any good for her to dissolve into anger or grief. Not when Fred must be feeling just as much, if not more so, having lived directly with Jason recently. Sookie presses her lips tightly together, but in spite of her best efforts, she can feel her brows furrowing and sees her vision already blurring, though she manages to keep the tears from immediately spilling over.

"How long has it been?" she asks, voice strained and quiet.

"A day. No, two, I think," she says, and it's only then she realizes that she's lost track of time. She's not supposed to fall apart over this, but she hadn't even told Jason's sister that he was gone. For all that Fred knows of other dimensions, for all that she's seen in places like Darrow, she hadn't been prepared for it.

She should have been prepared. Maybe that's the most dangerous thing about Darrow: it's a place that sometimes makes you think you can just let your guard down.

"I'm sorry, I should have... I thought I was wrong at first, that maybe he was working or... I don't know."

She wants to throw up. Or maybe she wants to scream. Or maybe she wants to tear apart everything in front of her, everything that she can see, feel, and touch — everything that, apparently, no longer includes Jason, and that thought alone is enough to make her heart lurch and stomach turn.

With her eyes open too wide and already burning from the effort, Sookie briefly rests a hand on her chest.

"I'm so sorry, Fred," she says after a moment, stepping forward for a hug, which she thinks that maybe the both of them need. Just maybe. It's the only way that she can keep herself from feeling only the selfish thoughts, the ones about how she can't go on without her big brother. He's always been there. He's the only one who's always been there. "And please, please don't apologize to me. I think both of us know how he... how he got caught up in his work, sometimes."

He got caught up in work, but Fred can't remember a time when it ever took her long to get ahold of Jason if she needed him. Right about now is the longest she's gone without talking to him since they figured things out, since they both got their memories back and realized what they had.

Fred's never been as much of a hugger as Sookie, but she figures that they could both use one, right about now. Fred hugs her back, and it does help, she thinks. At least, for a second.

When she pulls away again, she's not sure what she's supposed to do. But she's felt like that ever since she realized that Jason wasn't ever gonna come home.

"Do you... do you wanna sit down? I could get you some water or I've got some cocoa? I know it's kinda warm for it..."

"Cocoa would be good, I think," Sookie says, deciding that it's probably better for the two of them to keep themselves busy, even if they don't end up drinking the cocoa. Sookie's been almost trained over the years to cope by giving herself things to do. There's little that calms her down as much as going through gran's house and helping her clean every last nook and cranny.

She glances briefly to the side. Fred and Jason's apartment isn't all that messy to begin with, but she thinks that this time, cleaning it up might be a bit of a landmine. She's not sure what belongings of Jason's she might come across. She might end up clinging too tightly to everything she finds.

"Let me know how I can help. If you've got eggs and flour... I could probably also work on baking something."

build me a star in your forehead

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